things i want to say...

...but can't :c

_i'm sorry. i didn't mean to say those things to you. i've been trying my best not to hurt you but somehow i still manage to squeeze that frail heart of yours into bits. i'm a JERK! so shoot me..

_i'm not angry. i'm sad, because after 4 months i'm still the same 'ol insensitive, stupid, biatch who doesn't know how to do anything right. i thought i have changed, but sadly, i haven't.

_ i want to cry. it hurts you know.

_i love you. i have no idea how to show how much i really do. somehow all i have given you are heartaches.

_ i do not spend for you because i wanted to give you something that really came from me. something personal. things i thought you'd be happy to have..turned out you'd rather have the libre and 'ol that..

_ i really do not have money right now. i'm broke. it isn't obvious, but i am. if i only have all the money in the world, i'll splurge it on you.

_pls. don;t take everything i say seriously. most of the time, i just wanted to banter and tease..but you weren't so happy bout that, guess i was wrong again..

_ you have nothing to be insecure about. i'm with you right. i thought that was enough & i don't have to prove anything..i was wrong in that too..

_ my friends are my friends and they will always be. i love them, yes and i like being with them. but please do NOT compare what i have with them to what we have. the difference is too vast. i'm happy with you, 'enuf said..just don't clam up just like that..


i do not want to tell you all these personally because i can't. i'd just burst into tears if i do and that's the least you'd want to see..a cry baby..